Last week I had a couple of really bad days in my marriage, and I was amazed by how strongly the flashbacks and crazy obsessions came back! I felt I was in real danger of sexually acting-out. I have heard from old timers that:
"When you think lust is gone and everything is quiet, lust is doing push-ups just outside the door," and "The most dangerous sentence for me is this: I can handle it."
Fortunately, when I was in the midst of this mental and emotional storm, I was able to take the right actions:
- I called my Sexaholics Anonymous sponsor four days in a row (normally I call him once a week nowadays)
- I followed my sponsor’s instructions as if my life depended on it
- I called another trusted SA oldtimer
- I called other married fellows in SA, leading with my weaknesses
- I prayed the Resentment Prayers from the 7th Step Prayer (in the book Alcoholics Anonymous), asking my Higher Power to take my character defects away
- I had an extra call with our Couple Sponsors (we are sponsored by another couple in S-Anon Couples in Recovery)
Thank God these actions worked! Thank God for keeping me sober. And thank God for SA.