Sexaholics Anonymous Has Set me Free From the Bondage of Sexual Lust
Recently in a Sexaholics Anonymous meeting that I attended while traveling last week, we read the Sexaholics Anonymous (“White Book”) chapter titled "Steps Six and Seven” (pages 115-121). I thought that was a great section to read again, and it elicited good sharing among our SA members. One paragraph especially stood out for me this last week:
Steps One through Five should have the natural and inevitable effect of creating in us a new heart that wants to do right. Note that the wording of Step Six, "Were entirely ready . . ." depicts a state of mind issuing from a prior change of attitude. If this state of mind is not present, something is amiss. The crucial attitude change that should have accompanied Steps One through Five—surrender—has never taken place (SA “White Book,” p.116)
My own experience in taking Steps One through Five under the direction of a sponsor did have its expected result. That "crucial attitude change" was surrender. And part of what brought about that change of attitude was the consistency of working through my inventories with my SA sponsor.
In working through those first Five Steps, my wrongs, faults, and character defects became undeniable. I saw patterns emerge that looked quite ugly to me. After one particular inventory that I shared with my SA sponsor about someone I had harmed, he asked me the typical question he would ask at the end of each inventory. He asked, "So how are you feeling?" I responded honestly that I felt terrible about what I had done, and that I did not want to be like this anymore. His response was honest and what I needed to hear: "That's ego-deflation, and it's necessary."
The SA Twelve Steps are simple, but they are hard work. At times they are quite painful because I need to face the honest truth about myself, no matter how ugly it is. But the payoff in change of attitude and a new heart is worth all of that work and all of that pain. In this new way of living that has begun for me because of Sexaholics Anonymous, I no longer have to carry with me that unbearable load of guilt and shame.
Surrender truly has been that "crucial change of attitude" that has set me free from the tyranny and bondage of sexual lust that had ruled my life. Today God's rule in my life brings freedom and peace, as well as sexual sobriety. This life is so much better.
