"Selfishness--self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Alcoholics Anonymous Chapter 5
Selfishness remains a serious character defect for me. I have never had a pure motive in my life, never a 100% unselfish motive. There is always something in it for me, and to think otherwise is evidence of my self-delusion.
But it doesn't have to be that way. I can make progress toward an alternate way of dealing with the world around me and the people in it. It's just that I also can't seem to do that in my own power. Once again I need a Power greater than myself. I need God.
Overcoming Selfishness Through Recovery in Sexaholics Anonymous
So is Sexaholics Anonymous recovery really supposed to be selfish, or is it to be focused elsewhere? For me, at least sometimes in actual practice, my recovery is not focused on myself. Sometimes it is Godward instead of self-centered. And when I have really surrendered both the good and the bad in me--both my addiction and recovery--to God, then I'm more likely to be able to have a recovery that doesn’t need to be selfish or self-centered, because it is other-centered
Without working the Twelve Steps of Sexaholics Anonymous--and without working the SA program of recovery under the direction of a sponsor--I would not have made any real progress toward the goal of sexual sobriety. How could I have that if I had not yet had a spiritual awakening, if I had not yet made a right connection with God and others? For me, the SA program is the working of the Steps, and anything short of that was to remain in that fantasy world of self-delusion, including the insidious delusion that I was actually getting better. (Sober since 2009)