Select stories from recovering sex addicts

Welcome to the Members Share section of our website.

Here members of Sexaholics Anonymous share their experience, strength and hope. There are stories for everyone, from all walks of life. We hope that you can find inspiration from these shares.

Please always remember that the Member Shares are not official literature of Sexaholics Anonymous, they remain the personal opinions of their respective authors.

From Sex Addict to Good Dad

Hello.  I'm a recovering sex addict, sober since July 2015, checking in this morning with a lot of gratitude and a heart of joy. My Higher Power is working amazing things in my life. How do I know that recovery and sobriety are worth all the effort?  How do I...

Pigs Can Fly

As an early recruit to the FPSA (Flying Piggies School of Aviation), also known as the Flying Piggies SA Whatsapp Group, I have keenly observed its development. At first, we were all aloft on Higher-Powered wings and crash landings were virtually unheard of. But later we witnessed some...

Women in Mixed Meetings

I’m a sexaholic, sober since 05/26/14, currently working Steps one through Three, and trying to let go of the fact that I will never do Step Four perfectly.

Early in my recovery, I was apprehensive regarding what I...

Connecting With God

Why did I spend so many years avoiding God! Insanity! Clearly I am an addict and I do crazy things when I'm using the lust drug. Thank God that I no longer have to use that drug and I can live free of that bondage.

But I really did avoid God for...

Earning Respect

When I was an active sexaholic,  I was irresponsible and unreliable, and I did a lot of stupid,  insane things.   No matter how hard I tried, I could not stop. It didn't matter if I kept myself extra busy with work or other activities; the addiction always "...

Step Nine Out of Order

One of my sponsees shared a humorous incident (he has shared this with others, so this is not sharing out of turn).

Shortly after starting recovery, his wife decided that he needed to accelerate his recovery.  (A wee bit of codependence there…)  I...

Contented Sex Addict

I'm a sex addict, sober since July 1, 2015. It's been an interesting day. And thanks to my Higher Power, my sponsor, and my sobriety, I survived it quite well.

I won't go into details, but we had a "family meeting" with my daughter's therapist that did...

No Half Measures

The Steps work when I work them. "My life is too unmanageable" is not an excuse for struggling, because SA teaches us how to handle unmanageability.  Our program is for all kinds of people who are powerless over lust, and whose lives are unmanageable.

In the the beginning of Big Book...

Fighting or Surrendering

After hearing another member share about fighting versus surrendering our disease, I decided to see what our White Book might say on the topic.  Following are are two helpful passages:

Joining a group doesn't...

Time Takes Time

One Saturday afternoon I sat in a workshop held by one of our former nonsexaholic  trustees and his wife.  The topic was "The Family Afterward" from the AA Big Book chapter of the same name.  One thing I remember is the statement "time takes time."  When it...

I Cannot Fight Lust

I heard another member say "fight the good fight," and this reminded me of my own experience and how wrong my thinking was.  My sponsor said to me that I cannot fight lust because I'm powerless to fight lust. He also said that God is not some big dog I get on...

The Truth About Me

I'm a pacifist so I don't fight much, but I do love to manage. The problem is that  managing my illness does not work so well. As I have read in Alcoholics Anonymous (AA),

Is he not a victim of the delusion...

Step One: Stirring Up the Mud

When I started working the Steps, especially Step One, my sponsor asked me to write e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g explicitly. While doing this, I had lustful dreams and my sleep was disturbed. But today I compare this to having a glass of water with a layer of sand on the...

Internet use without porn

When I first came into SA, I had to throw my computer out of my house. I would go to the library a couple of times a week to work on the computers there, for one hour each time.  After 1.5 years I was able by God's grace to take a computer back into my...

Perfection-ISM

One of my big character defects is perfectionism.  It has manifested in many ways over the years.  As a result of my most recent slip, I have been granted a great spiritual insight – perfectionism drives my...

My ideas didn't work

I was talking to my sponsor about my latest slip.  I told him how I'd acted out and then said, "I know I need to work the steps, I know I need to do the next...

The Birds

I live by the sea, where there are many gulls.  Seagulls normally mind their own business but once, when I was walking along eating a cake, a seagull noticed me and swooped.  It hovering just above my head, close...

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