I was hit with pride in church today. I hated everyone around me, but I prayed for help. Then an answer came to me which was quite helpful: sitting there in the church, I suddenly realized that I had been judging others. I said to myself, "You judge them by appearances and beliefs, you think that they are stupid and you know something better. Think about how much love and care those people around you give to others. How much have you given in your life? How much are you capable of love? It's not important for Me how much you or they know, it matters much more how much you give, and how much connection of love you have. So if you want to compete with others, compete in love." That hit me quite hard.
Since then,however, those thoughts about pride and love have really helped. Today it's much easier for me to see where I want approval or authority, where I think I'm better than others--and to remind myself that I'm just a human being, like other human beings. I can see that I’m just a regular sex addict, the same as other sex addicts. I now realize that pride is a lie, and that pride never really worked. Today I also realize that happiness comes from God, from loving others and from giving and forgiving others, in the fellowship of Sexaholics Anonymous as well as in all of my relationships. I am realizing that many people around me give much more love and care and help to others than I give to others. I realize that I need to change into a servant from this self-appointed-baby-king. Thank you SA and to my Higher Power for teaching me these things.