Last week I had a couple of really bad days in my marriage, and I was amazed by how extremely strongly the flashbacks and crazy sexual obsessions came on! I felt that I was getting into danger of sexually acting out. As I have heard many times from Sexaholics Anonymous oldtimers:
"When you think lust is gone and everything is quiet, lust is doing push-ups just outside the door."
"The most dangerous sentence for us is: I can handle it."
Fortunately, in the midst of my mental and emotional storm, I was able to take the right actions:
- I called my sponsor four days in a row (normally only once a week nowadays)
- I followed my sponsor’s instructions as if my life depended on it (which it did)
- I called another trusted oldtimer
- I called other married fellows, leading with my weaknesses
- I prayed the Resentment Prayers out of the “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous
- I prayed the Seventh Step Prayer, asking God to take away my character defects
- My wife and I had an extra call with our couples sponsors (my wife and I are sponsored by another couple in the program of Couples in Recovery)
Thank God, these actions worked! Thank God for keeping me sober. And thank you God for leading me to the fellowship of Sexaholics Anonymous.