Fighting or Surrendering

After hearing another member share about fighting versus surrendering our disease, I decided to see what our White Book might say on the topic.  Following are are two helpful passages:

Joining a group doesn't automatically make the problem vanish. Most of us had tried stopping countless times. The problem was we couldn't stay stopped; we had never surrendered. So, the first time the craving hits again, when we get that urge for a fix, we give it up, even though it feels like we'll die without it. And at times, in our new frame of mind, the craving may seem stronger than ever. But we don't fight it like we used to; that was always a losing battle, giving it more strength to fight back. Neither do we feed or give in to it. We surrender. We win by giving up. Each time. (p. 66)

In summary, for us surrender is the change in attitude of the inner person that makes life possible. It is the great beginning, the insignia and watchword of our program. And no amount of knowledge about surrender can make it a fact until we simply give up, let go, and let God. When we surrender our "freedom," we become truly free. (p.81)

My own experience is also that fighting was always a losing battle. At best, my fighting would postpone the inevitable for a while, but the pressure from lust was still building to the point of explosion. I could not fight lust and stay sober for long.

But having worked the  Twelve Steps with a sponsor, I have had a different experience. My current experience that gives me a hope that doesn't fail is that when I really, truly surrender my lust and my will and my life to God, He is willing and able to take care of my lust and my life. And with God in control of my life, it is so very much a better life to live.

And that's what gives me the strength to get up each day and surrender my lust and will and life yet again to a loving God who could and would restore me to sanity.

For me, fighting and surrendering are two entirely different things. One works, and one doesn't.