Unconditional surrender

The crazy thing about unconditional surrender is that I don't get to specify the terms.  When I finally admitted at age 51 that I was 100% hopeless (Alcoholics Anonymous page 43) I began to surrender.  There was ripping and tearing of flesh (figuratively) and just about everything I surrender has claw marks from me trying to hold on BUT I did/do surrender.
My kind and gracious sponsor put it this way.  It's like a contract where all the terms and conditions are blank.  I sign my name at the bottom of the page and God as I understand God fills in all the terms.  I surrender management of my life unconditionally. No more plans - no more agendas - no more long term goals (otherwise known as self-will run riot in a suit).
I am so grateful for the AA Big Book and the SA White Book.  The AA Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions is also very helpful.  I got my first Big Book in 1984 and my first White Book in 1996.  What really made them useful was when I actually began to read them in 2009.  I continue to read these books just about every day.  They are spiritual in nature and the more I read them the more I learn.
What a wonderful thing it is to be a sexaholic!  I was talking to a friend this morning about lust.  He was telling me that instead of using lust to take from others he TAKES the lust and surrenders it to God as he understands God.  And that's when he gets to experience the love and grace and forgiveness of the Spirit of the Universe.  I can't imagine anything better.  Now that's Intimacy and True Union.  With God no less.  What a deal.