Self-sponsorship

In self-sponsorship a newcomer asks the wisest person he knows in the program to help him work the steps - himself.  I was my own first sponsor... Yes, I was the handsomest sponsor I ever had, though not a terribly effective one.

Having myself as a sponsor was surreal.  When I called to check in, I always went straight to voicemail.  The same thing happened when I called myself back.  Any book recommendations I made I'd already read.  When I asked my sponsor's experience about something, the response was always: "It's the same as yours."  Finally I got to Step Four and he told me to quit taking his inventory.  Soon after that, we parted.

I still see my first sponsor at meetings and he seems to be doing the same as me.  We both have the same sobriety date, and the same new sponsor, a man who's nine years sober in the program, and we're doing much better on the whole.

To all self-sponsors out there, I hope you do better than I did. I'd probably recommend firing that sponsor as soon as possible, though, and my first sponsor would probably say the same.