Mature Ring-bearing

I was thinking of weddings and why happy couples tend to entrust two of the most important elements - their rings, the symbols of their lifelong fidelity and commitment - to some of the least mature ring-bearers, such as small children, hung-over best men, and sometimes even the family dog.

I've never been married, but I personally would want the rings chained in advance to the altar, not subject to the whims of a 6 year old or the stinky pocket of a groomsman.

Regardless of who is the ring-bearer at my wedding - in the event I do find a woman to marry me - the ring for the groom will end up on the hand of the one person in my life I trust the least: me.

I am a man who, historically, can't be trusted alone for a few hours without masturbating, cannot surf the internet longer than 30 minutes without trying to find suggestive images, can't have web access on his phone at all, and can't to take a trip to the grocery store without ogling some lady.  And here I would be, a guy with the maturity of "Animal" from The Muppets, entrusted with a woman's love.

My SA groups surprised me early on with acts of trust, assigning me, a young sex addict, with the key to open the meeting room, the group funds which sometimes amounted to a sizable sum, and buying literature.  If they had asked people in my past life, they would have known these were bad ideas, but somehow, I've proven trustworthy.