Addicted but not Hopeless
I appreciate the reminders that I’ve heard recently from my Sexaholics Anonymous fellows of what it was that I was addicted to in the past: I was addicted to lust. Lust was my drug of choice. In the past I would use lust as the solution to all of my many problems. But eventually lust became a problem for me instead of a solution, and then I could not stop lusting, even when I wanted to stop.
Before I came to SA, I thought that my sexual acting out behaviors were my problem--but actually they were not my problem. My sexual behaviors that resulted from my lusting were my problem. Through SA, I have discovered that when I am not lusting, the sexual acting-out behavior simply does not happen. In fact, I have learned that lust is not actually my real problem, but trying not to lust also did not solve my real problem-- and I found that attempting to fight lust on my own proved to be impossible anyway.
Working the Sexaholics Anonymous Program Enables Me to Recover from Sexual Lust
But what was possible for me was to work through the Twelve Steps of the Sexaholics Anonymous program, under the direction of an SA sponsor. And when I worked through all of the Twelve Steps, as my sponsor suggested that I do them, I began to make the right connection with God. And then I could surrender to God--and then I finally had a real solution to my real problem, which had actually been a missconnection with God and others.
So the way I got started on real recovery over my sex addiction was to get a Sexaholics Anonymous sponsor and follow all of his instructions. Up until I was willing to do that, "sobriety" was only temporary at best.
The program works, IF you work it.