R-LC BATCH 2 #011
…when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
(AA p. 59; SA p. 6)
Out of fear, I used to avoid confrontation. When I had a disagreement with someone, an invisible wall would go up inside me, separating us. This was the only way I knew to feel safe and protected. My SA sponsor suggested another way for me to think about confrontation—as merely a dialogue between people who hold different points of view. With this view two people can hold even opposite perspectives without the necessity of demonizing one another. That perspective was new to me. In my self-centered thinking, I had considered confrontation a negative experience in which someone was attacking me.
Recently, I found Step Ten helpful in this new viewpoint. My wife and I had a heated discussion regarding our vacation plans. A long silence ensued between us until I realized I was wrong. I lowered my invisible wall and began a dialogue with her by making amends for my behavior. I calmly shared my hopes and fears about our vacation, and I listened to her desires. We found common ground. By promptly realizing and admitting my wrong, I demonstrated care for my wife’s needs, and I carried away no resentments.
Grant me the humility, God, to admit my wrongs quickly.